Starting Over

It may not always pay to be kind, but we should always do unto others what we would want other do unto us. After the incident when I experienced a backlash despite my niceness, I’ve knowingly and unknowingly drawn a clear line between work and personal matters with my people who work closest with me. Like how one guy in my office always say “don’t be a hero”, I could feel my conviction to make an impact on the people around me dwindling down.

Of course, God always has a way of bring us back to His purpose for us. Just this week, I received a phone call from a client who was very emotionally affected as he just broke-up last Monday. I invited him down for a quick lunch as I also had another lunch appointment after that (yes, 2 lunches a day will do so much benefit to my figure right?). While queuing up at the buffet line, he told me that he and his partner were together for 4 years. He looked at me for a brief moment and then, avoiding eye contact, said very softly: “Actually, I’m... I’m gay…”

I must say I appreciate his frankness. It must have taken a lot of courage from him to tell someone of his (probably open) secret who’s just a business associate. I actually thought of saying: “Don’t worry. I knew it all along.”

Instead, I said: “Gay or not, you’re a nice person.”

As I thought back, I thank God for those words that came out from me because he must have been quite conscious of his gender preference. Although I may not be able to impart Christian values to him at that point of time, I managed to shift our focus on his gender preference to him as a person. Nonetheless, I pray that one day, he’ll come to know God as his personal Lord and Saviour and follow the precepts of God.

Over lunch, he talked about certain terminologies that gays use and was quite candid about his relationship. Although it was not my practice to discuss sexuality over the dining table, I let him talk, as I knew he was still feeling hurt about his break-up. I told him something what a person once said, which I’ve also come to learn it hard myself. I said he must remember that his life does not revolve around one person only. What if something happens to this person? Then his whole world will crumble if his life is only around one person. Instead, his life also involves many others around him, like his family, his friends and some other people who may also need his care, concern and attention. This is the closest to biblical truth that I can advise him at that point of time.

As we parted, I wondered if the lunch and the talking helped him get better and over with his trauma, but I pray that even if he forgets everything we talked that afternoon, he’ll remember not to focus all his energy incumbent, but to shift his attention other things around him that are equally important. Everyone needs to move forward, even when the moving gets tough. Some people may have moved on one step ahead of us, we will eventually need to move on as well, even when it means starting over again, on 1st gear.

Getting back on the feet is never easy, but I think everyone always anticipate seeing the come-back kid. Isn’t it? Or at least I feel so… :)

When the Time's Up, What Have We Accomplished?

Yesterday was the last day of the 7th month in the lunar calendar. Not that I believed any of the practices that entails the spiritual connotation of that month, though I might once have believed in, but it’s always during this period of time that talks of spooks and death is either more popular or a hush-hush topic. Some refrain from such topics for fear that some spooks might follow them home. Well, one word of advise… Don’t imagine too much.

Was listening to one Chinese radio station in a car last evening and was drawn to the topic the DJs were discussing: life after death. I recognized one of the voices to be that of Moses Lim, along with some female voices, they were talking about why some people feared death. Someone suggested that it could be due to the unknown of what actually happens after death that people were terrified of. I think one of them put it very well when she said that we should all live our lives as if we are all tasked to accomplish something in our lifetime. Similar to that of an examination, when the time is up and we have to hand in our papers, have we accomplished what we were meant to do when we set off or have we handed in a piece of blank paper? Hmmm… have never thought about life from that perspective.

Indeed, we do need to see things from a different perspective to sometimes change our point of view. Remembered one part in the animation, Ratatouille, that Antoine Ego wanted to order some “perspectives”, which in the end, did change his perspective about Gusteau’s motto: Everyone can cook. Absolutely enjoyed the movie, besides it being hilarious and frenchy, the story line was also expected and unexpected, as what I’d call it. It’s so clear in my mind that I still felt as if I’ve just watched it yesterday. As a matter of fact, I did watch it not too long ago, like some 5 days ago? Me think Remy certainly beat Mickey hands-down!

Gonna be a long week ahead, with church anniversary celebration and wedding show all over the weekend. Am glad I applied for my off-in-lieu for next Monday. At least can spend a good whole day resting and being at home on my dad’s birthday. Am thinking of asking Mum to make some meat dumplings, “wanton”. Loved eating them and certainly don’t mind helping! :)

Back to the Scene

Yo! It’s been a while since I last blogged. Esther commented after Thursday’s District Meeting, while shaking her head in despair, that my blog has been left on its own for the longest time ever. I replied that Junming’s worse cos he’s still “Part of the Kallang Roar”, in a failing attempt to redeem myself on my lapse in blogging. Poor Junming…. It was only few moments before we passed the “Pi Pa Kao” drink to him cos it tasted really gross. As much as I tried to force the drink down my throat in an attempt to acquire a taste for it, I couldn’t continue doing it knowing that I might eventually throw up my supper shortly after. So, Junming have to take the rap of my “adventure” in tasting. Actually, he’s quite a nice brother…. (hee…. emmm…. : P)

Just before I forget, Happy Teachers’ Day! (belated) Hehe…. There were heaps of Teachers’ Day dinners at the hotel last Friday. Almost felt like “Back to the Future – School Days Chapter”. I was taking care of one and my colleague was taking care of four. All the function rooms on Friday were full and were all taken up by Teachers’ Day functions. Heard that Manjusri held their celebration at one hotel and all 300 had vegetarian! Well, they must be kind to the animals. It was nice to see teachers’ from different schools enjoying themselves and having a good time. After all, it is a tough job for them, made tougher with “helicopter parents” hovering over their children, and this day is set to commemorate their efforts. I've also asked my English Teacher, Ms Agnes Chee, from secondary school for lunch on Saturday, 1 September. It’s amazing we still kept in touch after all these years. I can still vividly remember that she passed me a sweater on the day I was to fly to Brisbane to start my university studies. She said: “I got this from Melbourne and thought it would be good for you cos the lecture halls would be cold…”. Can’t wait to see her… When I spoke to her last Friday to ask her out for lunch, she said: “You still look the same right?” I replied, with a bit of awkwardness: “Yeah, I think so. But after all, I’m already thirty, you know!”. Haha! A pity I didn’t manage to get a picture of her as I forgot my camera when I left home.

These 3 months have been eventful. We had our Malacca Church Camp, where we were dressed up as, well, maids… It’s not such a bad thing cos we can travel light, with only one apron to pack. Fortunately our hotel was so much nearer to the city area this year. We finally had the chance to visit round Malacca during our lull times. The Chendol was indeed worth a try, but I also find it a tat bit too sweet for me. Unlike last year, I didn’t go up on a trip to anywhere in Malaysia after that as my work schedule doesn’t permit.

Of course, much happened after the church camp. There were nice surprises like having that significant other to go out with. No wonder Junming was exceptionally concerned if I’ve been shepherded every week for the longest time I can remember. It was definitely awkward for me as I’ve never imagined going into a relationship could be so structured. When I told my sis about it, she exclaimed: “What? Official? Must go official one ar?! Must sign paper or not? Since it’s official right?!”.

Relax lah! Someone told me that going official in this sense is like a baby dedication in church. It’s just so we have covering in our relationship from the church and the leaders. Think of it as a relationship dedicated to God.

So, no need to sign papers, print thumb prints or do any sort of swearing in. Just …. official. Hahaha! Easy to understand right, sis? If you still don’t understand, you are too complicated! :D